Darwin’s Mistake

Three monkeys sat on a coconut tree,
Discussing things as they’re said to be;
Said one to the others, “Now listen, you two
There’s a certain rumor that can’t be true
That man descended from our noble race;
The very idea is a big disgrace.
No monkey ever deserted his wife,
Starved her babies and ruined her life;
And you’ve never known a mother-monk
To leave her babies with others to bunk,
Or pass them on from one to another
Till they scarcely know who was their mother;
And another thing you’ll never see,
A monk building a fence around a coconut tree
And let the coconuts go to waste
Forbidding all other monks to taste;
Why, if I’d put a fence round the tree
Starvation would force you to steal from me;
Here’s another thing a monk won’t do
Go out at night and get on the stew
Or use a gun or club or knife
To take some other monkey’s life;
Yes, man descended — with all his fuss,
But, brothers, he didn’t descend from us!”

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